Dear IRS.......

Dear Internal Revenue Service:

Enclosed you will find my 2007 tax return

showing that I owe

$3,407.00

in taxes.

Please note the attached article

from the USA Today newspaper;

dated 12 November,

wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense)

is paying $171.50 per hammer

and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.

I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats

(valued @ $2,400)

and six (6) hammers

(valued @ $1,029),

which I secured at Home Depot,

bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00.

Please apply the overpayment of $22.00

to the

'Presidential Election Fund,'

as noted on my return.

You can do this inexpensively

by sending them one 1.5' Phillips Head screw driver

(see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper

detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5' Phillips Head Screws).

One screw is enclosed for any

intrest you feel I have accrued

and for your convenience.

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year,

and I look forward to paying it again

next year.

Sincerely,

A Satisfied Taxpayer