1.16.2008

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

Politically speaking.....
There are so many answers to choose from!
Take your pick below.
AL GORE:
"I invented the chicken!"
ALBERT EINSTEIN:
" Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken ."

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
"We have reason to believe there is a chicken,
but we have not yet been allowed to have access
to the other side of the road. "


ARISTOTLE:
"It is the nature of chickens to cross the road."

BARBARA WALTERS:
" Isn't that interesting?
In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time,
the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting,
and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road. "


BILL CLINTON:
" I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
What is your definition of chicken ."


BILL GATES:
" I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken.


COLIN POWELL:
" Now to the left of the screen,
you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road..."


COLONEL SANDERS:
" Did I miss one?"

DICK CHENEY:
" Where's my gun?"

DR SEUSS:
" Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed
I've not been told. "

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
"To die in the rain. Alone. "

GRANDPA:
" In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road,
and that was good enough. "

Hillary Clinton:
" I have vast experience with chickens and if elected,
I will ensure that EVERY chicken has the ability to cross any road they desire."

JOHN KERRY:
" Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!
It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions.
I am not for it now, and will remain against it. "

JOHN LENNON:
" Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. "

MARTHA STEWART:
"No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going.
I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level.
No little bird gave me any insider information. "

NANCY GRACE:
" That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY!
You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks."

PAT BUCHANAN:
" To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American."

GEORGE W. BUSH:
" We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.
The chicken is either against us, or for us.
There is no middle ground here."

DR. PHIL:
" The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal
with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after
the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road.
What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting
by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems
before adding 'NEW' problems ".

























11 comments:

Cliff said...

Richard Nixon said "I'm not a chicken."

Bob Dylan sang a song about a chicken, but no one could understand what he was singing.

Michelle said...

Interesting post. I tagged you for the Love song meme.

Pilgrim said...

Hilarious. I laughed out loud at Hemingway's response. Thank you.

Panaderos said...

For a moment I thought Bill Clinton would say, "I did not have sexual relations with that chicken." Hahaha

Great post, Liquid!

Linda Jones Malonson said...

This is so funny and real, until it scary. This is a good post!

Hope you have a nice day.

Stylin said...

That was hilarious!!
I am laughing so hard at your comments too!!!

SandyCarlson said...

Hilarious is definitely the word! All of these are dead on! Love it.

Bella said...

I loved this!

Too funny!

Bella

Memphis said...

Crazy-assed chicken!

Amel said...

This is a BRILLIANT post!!! :-D

Btw, THANKS for leaving comments in my blog. ;-D

Jon said...

A great post with captions that reflect a keen wit and sense of humor that had me laughing out loud. Thanks for making my day, and thanks for your kind comments on my blog.
Best regards, Jon in Vicksburg, MS on 2-2-08