5.28.2008

Ode to "Bo Ragon"..............


Therefore ,

it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity,

as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the B-BQ the following chain of events are put into motion:



Routine.....

(1a) The woman does the grocery shopping.
(1b)WIFE WORKED LAST NIGHT HAD TO DO SHOPPING MY SELF.


(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill

- a drink in hand.


(3)MR MOM PREPARES THE MEAT FOR COOKING, CLEANS GRILL, PAUSE HAD TO MAKE TEA KIDS DRANK IT UP BEFORE DINNER WAS READY CLEANED COUNTER TOPS 3RD TIME SINCE STARTING
CLEANED PATOES POKED HOLES AND SPARYED WITH PAM, THEN ADDED A LITTLE GARLIC WRAPED WITH FOIL TO GO ON TOP RACK ON GRILL
,


Here comes the important part:


(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
(4)MR MOM PLACES THE MEAT, TATERS, AND OINIONS ON GRILL

More routine....

(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.

He thanks her and asks if she will bring another drink while he deals with the situation.

Important again:

(5 & 6)MR MOM GOES IN SIDE UNLOADS DISH WASHER, THEN RELOADS, CLEANS SKILET FROM MORNING SHIFT, CLEANS COUNTER TOPS 4TH TIME, CLEANS TABLE, THEN TAKES OUT BEER BREAD FROM FRIDGE MADE IT THE NIGHT BEFOR, CLEANS BREAD PAN, SETS OVEN TO 350 AND SETS TIMER, GETING OLD AND CANT REMBER TIME ANY MORE HAVE TO USE TIMER. AND AFTER 2DRINKS BEST TO SET TIMER, (7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(7) MR MOM TAKES MEAT OFF GRILL, RUNS IN SIDE TIMER GOING OFF ON BREAD, PUTS MEAT UNDER HEAT LAMP, GRABS BREAD OUT OF OVEN, JUST RIGHT LOVE THEM TIMERS, GOES BACK TO GRILL AND GETS TATERS AND OINIONS. VEGS JUST RIGHT PURPLE HULL PEAS, GREAN BEANS, MUSTER GREANS, AND FRIED OCRA.


More routine....


(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(8) SETS TABLE, TELLS KIDS TO GET THEIR OWN UTENSILS......

.(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.


(9)AFTER EATING CLEANS UP, UNLOADS DISH WASHER AND RELOADS TO START ANOTHER LOAD,
SETS OUT EGGS. CHEEZE MUSHROMS,

CUTS UP OINION LEFT OVER FROM DINNER,

MAKES WIFE A EGG OMLET, WAKES UP WIFE TO GO TO WORK,

ITS MORNING TIME FOR HER.

And most important of all:


(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.



(10) GETS NO THANKS FROM ANY ONE OLDEST SON GETS IN TRUCK, GOES TO GIRL FRINDS HOUSE,
SECOND SON GOES TO LAKE TO FISH THEY HAVE LINES SET OUT MIGHT BE BACK AT DAY LIGHT AND HE WILL EAT UP MOST OF

THE LEFT OVERS. BABBY SON TURNS ON HIS WEE HOOKED TO MY TV. SO I WAVE BY TO WIFE GOING TO WORK AND

TURN ON HWY 61 BLUES ON RAIDO MPB..


(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off.'And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....


(11) MAN HAS TO TALK TO HIM SELF WOMAN STILL ON NIGHT SHIFT, 15 YEARS AND COUNTING
AND THANKS GOD, HE DOES ALL THINGS,

IF SHE WAS NOT ON NIGHT SHIFT WE WOULD BE DIVORCED HOW ELS COULD WE STAY TOGETHER FOR 22 YEARS AND STILL GET A LONG..

PAUSE, CANT REMBER IF I CUT THE WATER OFF

AT THE BARN, DID I FEED THE HEFFIERS IN LOT.


GOES TO BARN FEEDS REMBERS DID NOT CUT WATER ON SO WATERS CALFS.
WORK CALLS FIRE TRUCK BROKE DOWN, GOES TO WORK, LOOKS AT HOW MANY HOURS HAD TO WORK THIS WEEK AND KNOWS WHY THEY HAVE ME ON SALARY.


GETS HOME TO COOK KIDS THEIR MORNING GRUB. SHOWERS AND GOES BACK TO WORK, WIFE CALLS TO TELL ME

SHE IS GOING TO BED.

AND IT ALL STARTS OVER WHEN I GET OFF WORK.

WHAT ELS BUT KIDS DO YOU HAVE TO LIVE FOR..
WORK TO LIVE
LIVE TO WORK.


Ya'll have a good one!

" Value yourself.
The only people who appreciate a doormat
are people with dirty shoes."

AND MY FAVORIT.


"You do not live in an unjust world created by others...
For the most part, you live in a world created by your attitude."


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



P.S. and by the way:

I commend you on this one!
You delight me.

Me

4 comments:

Gadfly said...

Again, I say ...

When I am barbecuing or grilling (they are two different things in Texas)

Is the only time a woman is not allowed anywhere near my meat at any time.

*chuckle*

Madam Z said...

Oh my! I am exhausted, just *reading* about your barbeque! I think I'll just stick with my frying pan, thank you.

BTW, being a wife myself, I can feel this wife's pain. She does all the prep and cleanup and he gets all the credit. One more example of "Life isn't fair!"

Liquid said...

Gadfly:
I agree.........two totally different moods of cooking!

lol

Liquid said...

Madam Z:

I am quite honored to see you here.....
Welcome and here is a cold towel and an Advil.

:)