5.23.2008

Happy B-BQ'ing!


We are about to enter the summer and B-BQ season which is usually kicked off this weekend for Memorial Day festivities.

Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the B-BQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine.....
(1) The woman does the grocery shopping.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - a drink in hand.
Here comes the important part:
(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another drink while he deals with the situation.
Important again:
(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine....
(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed 'her night off.'
And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....



Ya'll have a good one!

Me

11 comments:

Cliff said...

Is there any safe comment I can make here? Man handling his meat.....uh, no.

Woman getting hot because of everybody praising the man about his meat....no.

I guess that it's not the meat, it's the emotion.

cathouse teri said...

So true! We are too hard to please! That's the problem!

Sculptor Dude said...

What does it mean if the man is only guilty of #1, #2, #8, and #9?

#6 does not count with me because it doesn't happen ... meat is too expensive to allow it to burn.

Gadfly said...

*coughBULLSHITcough*

When I'm barbecuing, is the ONLY time that a woman is NOT ALLOWED NEAR MY MEAT!!

*chuckle*

SandyCarlson said...

My family portrait, Liquid! So true.

Thanks for making me smile. God bless!

Nit Wit said...

I got The Boss a huge grill last year for Mothers Day and Our anniversary. She loves to use it and most of the cooking on it is done while I'm sleeping.
I on the other hand spend a lot of time cooking in the kitchen. The kids and grandkids seem to prefer my cooking, except for The Boss' Pepper Steak and Egg Rolls. They all love my Chicken Fried Rice.

Blank said...

Funny. And true.

Serena said...

Yep, you have the Etiquette of BBQ pretty much down pat. LOL.:)

SandyCarlson said...

Hey, Liquid,
Here's a meme if you're game:
Six-word Memoir Meme

Bella said...

Thanks for clearing that up!

That's the TRUTH!!!

That will be my life...tomorrow night!

=) Bella

cathouse teri said...

I think you skipped the step where the man says, "Hand me my meat!"